I had a great pregnancy or so I thought. As he was my first child I didn't realise that he should have been moving a lot more. At 42 weeks I was induced, it wasn't very enjoyable but he was born during a massive thunderstorm with just a spotlight on him, it was amazing. He weighed 7lb 15oz !! He had a good apgar score of 9.1 So no one thought anything was wrong.

Later that night when he wouldn't feed and his feet were cold I shouted the midwife because I knew something was wrong. She took his temperature and all hell broke loose. Joel stopped breathing and was rushed to SCBU. We were told by the specialist that Joel had Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and that there was nothing they could do. We were given a room in SCBU and waited for him to die. We took lots of photos and had him baptised. Close family members came to visit and everyone said how gorgeous he was.

On the 27th May at 8.15am Joel died peacefully in my arms aged just 61 hours. I still miss him every day. He has a brother Luke aged 14 years and a sister, Hope aged 12 years.

I planted a tree in our garden in his memory and every year on his birthday and Christmas we let off a big loud firework and hope he smiles when he sees it in Heaven .